Took this from Jeremiah, since I got bored while watching House.
Top Five Ways to Make Me Frown

1. Dinner companions who insist on not eating, due to dieting.
2. Being obnoxious.
3. A tough question.
4. Being culturally insensitive.
5. Bad social etiquette.

Top Five People Who Have Changed My Life

1. My dad.
2. My High-School mentor, Jackie Beecher.
3. Patricia del Toro.
4. Gladys.
5. The Princess.

Top Five Emotions I Have Felt

1. Giddiness.
2. Anger.
3. Sadness.
4. Denial.
5. Despair.

Top Five Ways to Be More Like Me

1. Learn Spanish from Latina women, specifically Puerto Rican, or Cuban.
2. Read Slashdot everyday.
3. Have obsessive-compulsive tendencies, like washing your hands obsessively.
4. Smile everyday.
5. Learn how to make the perfect roast chicken.

Top Five Things I Believe With All My Heart and Soul

1. There is a higher power.
2. Allen Ginsberg was a genius.
3. Cher will never die.
4. Macs are better. Period.
5. I will raise a child.

Top Five Things I Wish Would Just Disappear

1. Leviticus 18:22
2. World Hunger.
3. AIDS
4. Memories of my past misdeeds that haunt me every so often.
5. Belgian cream puffs. Because they are Evil.

Top Five Things That Scare Me

1. Being stereotypical.
2. Insects.
3. Horror movies.
4. Bad manners.
5. Losing a job.

Top Five Rules My Parents Enforced on Me

1. No TV on weekdays.
2. No video games until school vacations or holidays.
3. No pointing at the moon, lest the moon fairy comes down and cuts your ears off.
4. Christmas with family.
5. No going out past Midnight.

Top Five Ways to Make Me Smile

1. Tell a dirty joke.
2. Say hello.
3. Point out to me just how gay I really am.
4. Love poetry.
5. Saying something silly.